During this
last marathon, as I waited at the finish line, I actually began to get a little
angry at some of the runners. Many of them were limping more than they were
running, and some were even crying. Yes, literal tears! These were grown folks,
not children, dragging themselves towards a finish line, knowing that they
probably wouldn’t be able to even walk the next day.
“Why in the
world are they doing this?” I asked myself. “Why are they torturing themselves
like this? Surely running a marathon is not that
important.”
When my
husband and daughter crossed the finish line, I asked them the same question
regarding the “criers.” They both stared at me as if I had suddenly turned
green.
“They’re
doing it for the kids, Mom,” my daughter said. “We’re all doing it for the
kids. Yeah, it’s hard. I even cried a little toward the end, but this is for
the kids at Saint Jude’s.”
“Didn’t you
see the wrist bands?” my husband asked. “Some people are running for specific
kids.”
“We ran for
Zoey,” my daughter added. “At first we were just running because we wanted to
run the marathon, but then we thought about Zoey and ran it for her.”
Not only did
I feel remorseful regarding my attitude towards the runners, but I also had a
lightbulb moment. I thought about all those years I spent writing and pursuing
traditional publishing. I thought about all the sacrifices I made, all the
tears I shed. I thought about my figurative limping toward the finish line. I
also thought about how, when I first started on this race, I did it because I
wanted to be a published author. Yet, once I really got deeper into my journey,
I began doing it for the kids. Now, more than ever, I do it for the kids. If it
were simply up to me and the pursuit of a dream, I would walk away. I would no
longer put myself through this “marathon” training of trying to publish a book.
But I can’t
quit. I must finish the race because I know that there are stories in me that I
need to share with kids—kids who, metaphorically, like the kids at Saint Jude Children’s Research Hospital, need hope and healing.
What about
you? Why are YOU doing this? Why are you continuing to run the race of children's book publishing?
I love, love, love this idea, Linda! I'm always looking for running / writing metaphors, and this is a beautiful one. I also love knowing you've got runners in that house of yours. xo
ReplyDeleteI love this, Linda! It is so TOTALLY about the kids. (And by the way, I'm also puzzled by the running thing. Why suffer, when there's a comfy sofa nearby, and a nice cup of tea?) ha. :) Seriously: You must be so proud of your family. Cheering you ALL on!
ReplyDeleteI am inspired by the runners in your family, and by you. Thank you for the reminder that it is "for the kids."
ReplyDeleteThank you for this. I've sometimes been feeling hopeless about my novel publishing so this is a good reminder about what's really important.
ReplyDeleteA perfect piece to read this morning as I dig back into something I can't seem to let loose of. Yes, like you, Linda, I'll NEVER be a runner. But I so get that determination. Thank you for writing this. Thank you for writing your books that kids need and love to read.
ReplyDelete