Rules For Success As A Writer by Steve Bramucci

Every year, someone writes a think piece about how MFAs are a waste of time because writing can't be taught, or maybe it's that writing shouldn't be taught because there aren't enough book deals out there and we're all living a pipe dream, or maybe it's that...actually I don't know what these think piece writers say after the first two points. By then my eyes have glazed over and rolled into the back of my head.

Some writers still reside in the camp of people who think talent is "as natural as the pattern that was made by the dust on a butterfly's wings," as Hemingway once said of Fitzgerald.

To which I respond with another Hemingway line, the last words of The Sun Also Rises, "Isn't it pretty to think so?"

It is "pretty" to think that talent is innate. But it's definitely not logical. Everything can be taught, every skill can be improved, and practice can close any "natural talent" gap at a scary-quick rate. How precious we writers must be to think that brain surgery and ballet can be learned, but that our beloved art is inborn. I won't argue about this anymore because people who take time to string together words about who is and who isn't a writer bore me immensely. Lines in the sand that separate creative people from one another are the one thing that I scoff at unapologetically -- and I hate scoffing!

But enough of this rant! If it's success you seek, I have the rules to achieving it. There are others...but you already know them.

1. Be an age. It doesn't really matter what age. I recommend somewhere in the 3-99 range. Anywhere in that 96-year span should be fine. The guy from The Stranger essay thinks you have to make it when you're young but that nonsense is counteracted by loads of examples. Including a little someone named Raymond Chandler who wrote some of the best detective novels in the history of the genre or Toni Morrison, who wrote her first book at 39. 
2. Make marks on a document. Use a Mac or a PC or a pencil or a crayon. George R.R. Martin uses a computer that runs DOS -- so don't sweat it if your laptop is a year old. I remember being at big waterski tournament and telling my coach that I was thinking about buying a new ski. He looked at my old ski, lying in the grass, and said, "World records have been set on that ski. Have you set any of them?" I shook my head and the coach patted my shoulder. "When you do," he said, "you can think about a new ski."
3. Work hard. This doesn't always mean you have to bang the keyboard 24-7. The ever-lovely Robin Benway once said to me at lunch, "We're writers, alive in the world, this is part of our work." If work always looks like sitting at a desk, you'll become the sort of writer who writes about writing or writes essays about who can and can't write -- neither of which are things that I personally like to read. I believe firmly in the following video, with the word "work" being something that we each have to define for ourselves. 
4.   Be grateful. For God's sake be grateful. When good things happen say "thanks," be excited, and allow yourself room to smile. As a wise man once taught us, "gratitude reciprocates." 
5.  Have fun. We've been told writing is thankless, that it'll leave us broke, that it's the hardest job on earth, and yet we have to compete with a million new writers every year who want to take the hardest job from us. We get told we can't make it by people writing think pieces who are also surely afraid that they won't make it. All of this makes writing pretty daunting. So if it's not fun, if there's no joy in it...then the juice might not be worth the squeeze.

Those are my rules, but what do I know? I went to grad school, my first book is being released when I'm 37, and I don't think I was born with any particular talent.

But here I am, still writing.

Steve Bramucci is a full time writer and the managing editor of Uproxx.com's Life section. His first book, Ronald Zupan and the Pirates of Borneo, will be released in January, 2017. 

Breaking All the Rules

What sorts of things work in writing middle grade? What isn't allowed? There are certain rules writers hear about at every phase of the creative process. But there always seem to be exceptions to those rules. Here's one I've seen successfully broken again and again of late:

Too Many Adults:
Middle-grade novels need to be populated with kids. Throw too many adults in, or worse, let too many adults start filing up scenes, and you'll lose your audience.

THE ABSOLUTE VALUE OF MIKE - Katherine Erskine
Apart from a Romanian orphan mentioned only in conversation (and seen in a brief video), Mike is the only kid in this story. His world is populated by Mike's genius but clueless father, his Great Uncle Poppy and Great Aunt Moo, and other adult characters, like Past, a homeless man.

THE GREAT UNEXPECTED - Sharon Creech
Best friends Naomi and Lizzie meet the strange Finn boy when he falls out of a tree. Much of the story alternates between the three children and two scheming elderly women half a world away. The story lines eventually intersect, but not before Lizzie and Naomi spend much of the story in a world of adults.

SPARROW ROAD - Sheila O'Connor
Twelve-year-old Raine O'Rourke follows her mother to Sparrow Road, an artists' colony where her mother has taken a job for the summer. Raine learns how art can both teach and heal and is essentially the only child character in the story.

HORTON HALFPOTT: OR, THE FIENDISH MYSTERY OF SMUGWICK MANOR; OR, THE LOOSENING OF M'LADY LUGGERTUCK'S CORSET - Tom Angleberger
Horton, the lowly kitchen boy, is accused of stealing the Lump, the Luggertuck family heirloom. While he has young servant friends, Bump, Blemish, and Blight, much of the story is peopled with adults: the self-centered M'Lady Luggertuck and her dastardly, dim-witted son, Luther (who though not an adult is older than the typical mid-grade character); the wooden-spoon wielding cook, Miss Neversley; Old Crotty, the lady's maid; Portnoy St. Pomfrey, the foul-breathed detective; and a band of land-locked pirates, to name a few. (I listened to this one on CD and enjoyed it so much, I read it again with my fourth grader.)

Can you think of other books that break this Too Many Adults rule? What about other mid-grade writing rules that have been successfully broken?

Rules Are For Suckers!

Okay, the above statement is not exactly "true", but hopefully I can explain what I mean. I've been thinking about all the rules were told to follow as writers. Team Member Michael Winchell did a post on this earlier in the month, about all the things were told are bad  to do as writers and I have to say, while writing my first novel I threw all the rules out the window and not because I wanted to--I had to.

When we write a novel, the goal is to create an extraordinary world (realistic or fantasy), remarkable characters, and an unforgettable voice that draws readers in and keeps them wanting to know more, consequently turning every page of our novel until they get to the end and become very, very sad that our book is over and they have no more left to read. 

For the above reason, I threw caution to the wind, killed my first (and second) draft of Nightshade City, and started fresh, this time with my voice and mine alone--and of course my rules. I threw out the notion that prologues should be avoided (yes, my book has one), that all adverbs are evil, to never use the word suddenly (still use that when I feel the need), and that "said" should be the only word used to carry dialogue (there are a few more that work quite nicely), among other steadfast rules.

Once I did that, I freed myself of doubt...all the doubt first time novelists have about writing and what they should and should not do, and the thought of being laughed at by agents and editors, as they all stand around the proverbial water cooler, snickering about the greenhorn writer who was ridiculous enough to send them a novel with a prologue--oh how gauche!

But guess what? That never happened. Not one agent said you've broken so many rules you are permanently banned from writing. And no one said, "Listen you silly, tacky girl--don't quit the day job." Shortly after I chucked those rules and wrote Nightshade City, my way, I started getting several requests from agents for more, which resulted in representation and lucky for me publication.

I guess in a nutshell, what I'm trying to say is writing without rules is a sure way to bring your true voice to the paper. And I'm NOT saying the rules don't matter. For obvious reasons, they do. You just need to write your book on your terms, with no set rules hanging over your head, impeding your thought process. Once you've done that, you can tighten up your manuscript and at that point you can give much thought to the rules you do want to follow or that do make sense for your story, but at the same time keeping your unique and original voice.

Of note, opening a book with the weather is a rule I do follow (at least for now), but this rule was broken by English author Edward Bulwer-Lytton who wrote Paul Clifford. "It was a dark and stormy night..." Clearly even breaking this rule worked for him. :)

xoxo -- Hilary